Men's Mental Health Is Highly Needed
While women are often the ones who seek therapy, typically making up nearly two-thirds of therapy clients, multiple studies have shown that men benefit more from the process. But men rarely seek therapy because they just don’t like the idea of opening up to a stranger and sharing their feelings.
Although, we are growing as a society in changing the narrative of men being emotionally intelligent, able to cry, encouraged to reach out for help, and focusing on self-care as a need, not a luxury...we still have a long way to go to reverse previous narratives.
According to the National Health Council, "men living in the U.S. can expect to live 5.9 years less than the average American woman according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) – 73.2 years (male) vs. 79.1 years (female)." The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention found that, in 2022, “men died by suicide 3.85 times more than women.” The National Institute on Drug Abuse has done research that has shown, “[m]en are more likely than women to use almost all types of illicit drugs, and illicit drug use is more likely to result in emergency department visits or overdose deaths for men than for women.”
We understand that although there is a need backed by research, therapy isn’t a very naturally masculine process. But we want to encourage men to push past their discomfort and seek therapy anyway because it can really help in so many areas of their life.
Here are some of the reasons why men should see a therapist:
Men Often Struggle with Their Identity
Many men today struggle with what it means to be a man. Decades ago, the definition was more concrete and rigid, but nowadays a man can explore all parts of himself which can create confusion for some. Should they be masculine or is masculinity somehow toxic? Should they show their emotions or not? Should they protect women or is that somehow belittling women?
It can be a confusing experience for men, especially if you are coming from a home like so many that have had to grow up without a father figure in the home, or fathers who were there but emotionally absent. And so men look to media and advertising to find clues about who they should be, and this can be incredibly damaging.
Therapy can be a space where men can learn to define themselves on their own terms.
Gain Understanding and Tools for Your Relationships
We are sure many of you reading this have seen the funny social media posts about how men tend to live on a logical plane of existence whereas women live on an emotional one. No one plane of existence is right and no one is wrong, it is a matter of learning to balance the two.
But, since men tend to struggle to express their feelings and express themselves in a way their partner can relate to, the relationship can take a hit and the two can grow apart. When we aren't aligned with our emotions, they can tend to run the show and for men the traditional emotion that has been acceptable to show is anger. Although, we know anger is a needed emotion, it can ruin relationships if boundaries have not been implemented.
Therapy can help men supportively explore their own feelings and learn how to relate to their partner on an emotional level with effective communication skills. This can help to avoid the blow ups and foster more meaningful connection.
Become the Best Version of You
Seeing a therapist doesn’t necessarily mean something is wrong with you. Often therapy can be a way to explore who you are, what you want, and how to reach your goals. In other words, therapy can be a means by which you become the best version of yourself.
If you hit the gym x times per week to get into the best physical shape of your life, why not hit the therapist’s office each week to get into the best mental and emotional shape of your life and be a total package? Continuing with the gym analogy, you acknowledge it is responsible to ask a friend to spot you as you lift those heavy weights to keep safe, seeking therapy is the same. We've got you!
Get Help for Substance Abuse
Studies have shown that men are far more likely to abuse drugs and alcohol as a way to cope with the stress and depression in their life. Therapy can show you how to cope without the need for these substances. When you are able to manage your emotions in a healthy way (not stuff them down), ask for help, gain tools to communicate your needs, and invest in healthy coping tools that value your inherit worth, you are less likely to turn to substances to cope.
Lower Your Suicide Risk
There has been a disturbing rise in instances of suicide among older American men. This is most likely a result of men not believing they have the right to seek help. When you’ve got to be the strong one all the time and fix other people’s problems, seeking outside help simply is not an option.
But it IS an option. Men need to get help with their issues so they don’t turn to suicide. Therapy can be a space to challenge these beliefs that prevent you from truly enjoying the life you live and can place a non-judgmental person on your team in a confidential way. You are valued and not a burden.
Help with Fatherhood
As we mentioned earlier, many men have grown up without proper role models. They then find themselves a father, unable to cope with the challenges and responsibilities. The historical view for men being "strong" and not showing emotions, is detrimental when you're needing to nurture your little one. Therapy allows men to discover who they want to be for their children and come up with a game plan to develop this side of themselves. Therapy can provide you the tools to regulate during those parenting struggles to support you in acting in alignment with your values, decreasing guilt or regrets.
Okay How Do I Get Help?
If you are a man struggling with these issues or any others and would like to explore treatment options, please be in touch. The clinicians at Deeply Rooted Psychotherapy are here for you and have your back. We would be more than happy to discuss how we may be able to help.
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